The Podiatrist

April 11th, 2010 - When you go through a life threatening trama, you become acutely aware of every ache and pain you may have, and believe me at almost 59 years old I have every ache and pain. So, while I do have very small feet, they give me very big pains, and it was time to make a visit to the podiatrist. If you have never been to a podiatrist let me start by telling you this. Having your feet rubbed is one of life's simple pleasures, feels great, is very soothing and relaxing, oh, and if your spouse is doing the rubbing, it may come with 'strings' attached.

What a switch to walk into a doctors office and have him tell you to take off your shoes and socks, instead of take of your clothes and wear this gown that will not, no matter how you try to cover yourself, cover all your parts. Some parts will remain exposed. You will be happy to know there is no little gown that they put around your feet, they simple leave them bare and exposed. Now believe me feet are not the prettiest thing so I would have been ok with a cover. Once you are de-shoed and de-socked, they move you over to the 'big chair'. You sit in this chair, it's foot rest comes out and they raise you so your feet sit at eye level with the doctor. Don't be silly, the doctor is sitting not standing! This is not a huidini stunt... Next they examine all your pulse points while nodding or shaking their head, as if to say 'this could be a problem'. I had to remind him, "I am recovering from a heart attack, no nodding or shaking the head unless it is good news" With that he smiled and said, "I do that all the time", just a little doctor humor". Perhaps he forgot that my feet are eye level and I may be tempted to kick him in his head and have a little 'patient humor'. As he was examining my feet I was tempted to say, "this little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home, etc... After looking at the callouses, and corns, maybe a budding bunion, and of course the tatoo on my ankle, he announced it was nothing serious. He was careful not to say nothing expensive to fix, for much of the fixing comes with different shoes, inserts for shoes, or lifts for shoes. Who knows maybe I will make 5 foot six inches (after all I am almost there). With your feet it is all about the footware. And technically flip flps (my preferred foot covering) can't even be called shoes. He told me I walk on the outsides of my feet, which causes pressure points on the insides, which cause the toes to roll over, which causes callauses, which cause pain and a visit to the doctor. A simple, non-custom insert for $50, and it should do the trick, unless of course it does't and I may need the custom inserts which are $500 PER FOOT. Interesting to note while I wear a 5 1/2 shoe size my inserts are a 7-8 in size. HMMM some men really don't see size for what it really is, but that's another blog. Also he recommended a special pair of flip flops, that look like something that gladiators may have worn back in the day. Because I am a sucker for flip flops.....you can guess whether or not I got them.

All in all, it was a great visit. I thought he would be shaving my feet, clipping my nails, filing away the callouses and causing me more pain. I was pleasantly surprized. No pain, except in the pocket book, and after a day in the new inserts my feet feel great. Now all I have to do is look for some clothing that looks good with thick, rugged looking flip flops. I am thinking capries with an armour vest.